None of this is new information to me, but these videos do an amazing job of explaining why our economy is woefully pathetic right now. These pretty much layout the whole problem from the beginning and make it really easy to understand.

Hello, gang! I don't know if you know this, but there is a lot of negativity in America these days. The winter can be a gloomy time every year as we see less and less of the sun. This year, in particular, seems to find us in an especially cold and snowy winter season. If that weren't enough, our nation is facing some trying times. Our economy is struggling and our government appears to have no idea what to do about it. People are losing their homes left and right and others can't afford to move as their equity has dwindled away. Baby-boomers facing retirement are watching their 401ks become 200 1/2ks and making the decision that they belong in the workforce a little longer. Many wish they had that option as layoffs increase under the weight of the slowing economy. It seems no one is immune. So what are we to do as we face more struggles every day? How do we capture that unbridled joy that eludes us?

( Easy... )

I've seen a bunch of these so I figured I'd do one as a year-end recap.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?

This was very much a year for gettin' shit in order.  I don't know that there were too many groundbreaking new things.  I did, however, spend New Year's Eve in a bar for the first time and that carried into New Year's Day so that counts.  Also, I undertook my first major remodeling project.

2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?


I don't really make resolutions.  That's a little organized for me.  I did, sort of, vow to move forward:  Spend a whole year making house payments and living my life without feeling like I was barely holding on by December.  While I absolutely felt that way in June, I feel pretty confidently over the hump.  For 2009, I'm vowing to spend less frivolously and rediscover the glory of milk through the reduction in soda consumption.  We'll see...so many vices...

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
I don't think anyone this year.  Johnny Danger is coming in the spring of '09.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
I hope not.  I'm so sorry if I forgot.

5. What countries did you visit?
United States and Milwaukee.  I have dual citizenship.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
A little more cushion in the pocketbook.  I didn't find 2008 lacking in the important things, so I'll just say a lot more of the same.

7. What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I'm bad with dates.  I don't even know what today is, but I remember New Year's, 4th of July, first night of Moondance Jam, the first night in Vegas and the last and I remember them because they were just a few days where I hadn't a care in the world.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Doubling the house payment that I was, inexplicably, struggling to pay and managing to maintain that throughout the year and be still be ahead of where I was last year.  Also, I learned a lot about myself on my home remodel.  Oh!  I got a pretty good start on understanding the basics of politics this year and I get why republicans and democrats hate eachother and I learned it in the same way that I learned about beer.  When you wrap your head around that thought, you can ask me about it further.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Every year I tell myself I'm going to make it to the lake to fish more.  It didn't really happen this year.  $4 gas didn't help.  Also, I totally failed my lunar mission, but to be fair, I didn't really have the resources.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I got sick a couple times and there was about 2 weeks where I couldn't lift my arm over my head, but nothing epic.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
I bought a billion tools this year and while none of them stand out as great, they are all tools that I won't have to buy again.  I really like knowing I have all of the necessary tools to complete a project.  Nothing sucks more than when you want to dig a moat and you have to stop everything to go buy a shovel.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Easy.   This guy's.  I was arrested zero times this year...so far.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled & depressed?
Pretty much everyone in banking.  The Vikings(At times, they do every year, but they can fix it).  Was Roger Clemens this year?  The government, which is really bad, because this is the first time I really even noticed.  They must have been really bad.

14. Where did most of your money go?
My house.  From the kitchen to the stairs to the living room to the landscaping to the tools to undertake all of those tasks.  Homeownership was pricey this year.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The trip to Vegas.  The election, until I realized I wasn't going to like the outcome.  The future.

16. What songs will always remind you of 2008?
Kid Rock - All Summer Long.  It's not even close.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a. Happier or sadder? Happier.
b. Thinner or fatter? Fatter. But sexier.
c. Richer or poorer? Richer.  Which is more a reflection of how poor I was last year.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
The aforementioned fishing, traveling(I had no vacation time this year), playing the guitar, spending time with my special ladyfriend and relaxing.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Work.  School.  This year we'll ease back on those things.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Christmas was spent with family.  Eating too much and napping on the couch.

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
Sadly, it was probably Pete.

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
I'm not sure when it happened, but yeah.

23. How many one-night stands?
None that I remember.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
The Office.  Locked Up Abroad(That's a weird choice right).  Honestly, I don't watch that much tv and when I do, it's low attention span content like Seinfeld, Family Guy and South Park. I've been too busy to relax and enjoy television.  I watch to decompress.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I'm too lazy to hate anyone.  

26. What was the best book you read?
I'm not sure if i read a book this year.  Well, for fun.  I read for class.  

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I'm officially getting old.  I didn't find anything new that I like.  Since, picking up guitar, I pay attention to music more so it's like hearing every song for the first time again, so that's pretty nice.

28. What did you want and get?
A brand new upstairs and the Yankees missing the playoffs.

29. What did you want and not get?
A pony.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
The Dark Knight, but to be fair, I only saw about 3 movies.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 29 and I went to the Strip Club with a dozen, or so, of my friends.  We also went to Mayslack's and maybe somewhere else in Noreast.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A big fat raise and that aforementioned pony.  That's two things, but how does one decide between the two?

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Lazy.  i haven't gone shopping in a year and I've more or less stopped caring what people think.  All that said, I'm just saying that I'm rarely over or under dressed.  I'd like to be over-dressed more.

34. What kept you sane?
My girlfriend and just enough vacations to get by.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I don't know, but I do know that I loathe Heidi and Spencer.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
The economy, the war, and the games played in politics themselves.

37. Who did you miss?
Sunday Family.  My poker compadres.  Smokey from Pervert Suicide.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
New people?  Scary!  I met my girlfriend last year but we really got to know eachother this year and I can't underscore the impact she has on my life, but technically we met was last year.  Maybe the Beecher.  He was an acquaintance prior to this year.  He's going to get me killed one day, but at least we'll die with Cheez-Its.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
I learned a lot about safety this year.  Most of it wildly paranoid, but some of it worthwhile.  I lock the door to my house now because intruders usually break in and lurk in the shadows instead of robbing you.  I learned that a candle burning in a jar 8 feet from any walls could burn down the whole house.  I've learned that there is a virtual cornucopia of gases waiting to kill me in my sleep and to diligently maintain the batteries in all of the devices that protect me from said gases.  I've learned that electric heaters may run 24/7 without incident while you watch them, but the moment you leave them unintended, they burn your house down(without remorse).  

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

Everybody Wang Chung Tonight? 

Ok, I've been talking about getting kitchen pictures up for a while now and I suspect that there isn't anyone left who hasn't seen the final(mostly) product.  But, I'm all about follow-through...or something.  So, here you go:

3 completely unrelated ruminations from the last 24 hours:

1.)  How sick are you of hearing, "I'm ________, and I approve this message."?  Is this a requirement for these ads?  I think it's getting a little out of hand.  Last night I saw a commercial with Al Franken giving me a heart to heart about his views for America.  At the end of his monologue, he says, "I'm Al Franken and I approve this message."  That leads me to believe other things that he's said were said without his approval under duress.  Isn't his endorsement of his own statement implied? 

2.)  UPN, or whatever channel 29 is right now, was airing The Rocky Horror Picture Show last night.  In addition to wondering if the Riverview Theater still does a live showing of this(I've always wanted to go since seeing a live show in Milwaukee about 10 yrs ago), I wondered how this show made it on the air during primetime hours.  Obviously, it's a pretty edgy topic for our American eyes.  I was, however, relieved to see that throughout the entire film, they blurred out the midsection on the recreation of the statue of David in one of the rooms in the castle.  The statue is in the background quite a bit and I would have been horrified to see an 8 pixel stone penis in the background while I'm trying to watch a touching tale of a young couple stumbling into a castle with a Transylvanian transvestite, a cryogenically-preserved motorbiker and a Frankenstein's monster wearing golden underpants created as a sexual plaything.  Thank you, channel 29, for protecting my innocent eyes from the human form as depicted in a classical sculpture.  That was close.

3.)  I've touched on this before, but recently it was released to the public what these asshats make for each episode of The Hills.  Seriously, this is really the end of us as a society, right?  Watch the following clip and try to wrap your brain around it.  Then, if your head doesn't explode, tell me what is a more haunting thought:  

                       a)  Audrina Patridge is actually that mind numbingly dumb and makes $665,000/yr and is looking for a raise.

                       b)  Audrina is acting and the writers actually wrote that in to the script. 

I don't really understand how the show works, but I know some stuff is scripted.  I assume that's just the major themes(orchestrating breakups and hookups, etc.) and not the actual play by play dialogue.  For example, there's no way these two would be talking about the Hadron Collider in a million years so I have to believe the writers made them bring that up.  I have no fucking idea why they'd do that, but I believe in my heart the writers were behind that.  Regardless, when does the writing end and reality tv take over?  I get a god damn chill down my spine thinking that our future leaders, teachers, scientists, and doctors are watching this show and the writers are coming up with ways to dumb it down further.

Ok, this is what I remember:

Tuesday - Steph and I arrived Tuesday night and had already gotten word from Pete and Christa that they had done a timeshare presentation and were going out to dinner at Brand Steakhouse and seeing Lance Burton as part of their compensation.  We checked in to the Monte Carlo and took care of some housekeeping.  With Pete and Christa occupied, we opted to get acclimated(Read: Feed me).  After a good amount of wandering to investigate the 4 restaurants we made reservations at for our fancypants dinner on Thursday, we settled in at a little pizza joint inside NY, NY.  It didn't take long to be recruited for the grand opening of Rok Nightclub.  We got a bunch of "VIP" passes and were assured we were on a list and told Tommy Lee would be there and the Black-Eyed Peas were performing.  Knowing Wednesday night was taken care of, we took the opportunity to head down to the Bellagio to see the fountains  and their fall conservatory display and catch a few shows and stopped in at Shea's Casino for some cheap beers and some of the most ridiculous karaoke I've ever seen.

Wednesday - We got up fairly early and were snagged into a timeshare presentation in exchange for dinner for two at this place at the Venetian, a couple tickets to the wax museum, and a gondola boat ride.  They called it the "Romance Package" though I'm not sure how romantic a wax museum really is.  Anyway, I'd done this timeshare presentation a couple years before so this was no surprise, but the sales tactics are kind of like what you've read about when discussing the worst of sub-prime mortgage sales.  It was a flurry of "yes" questions and then a giant leap of logic.  We did our best to let them know that Steph and I weren't even thrilled about being on this vacation, much less the idea of being stuck with a lifetime of vacations together.  We were in for the free stuff.  With all of our free tickets in hand, we met up with Pete and Christa who were having sushi for lunch and used our tickets for the wax museum.  I was actually surprised at how much fun that was.  We all took the opportunity to make our mark("Daddy, no!!!").  We hit the liquor store before heading back to the pool.  The pool at the Monte Carlo was nice, but don't let them sell you on the wave pool.  It was lacking.  Also, the lazy river was 3 ft deep and a torrent.  Too shallow to tread water, too deep to walk on your hands...we're lucky to be alive.  Andy and Kristina showed up in time for cocktail hour in our room and Dell Taco across the street and then we headed to Coyote Ugly at NY, NY.  We killed a little time before we met up with Ryan and Crystal(Steph's friends) and we all went to Rok.  I've got a couple of great shots from that night, but due to a memory card problem this is all I can muster.  Despite a lack of Tommy Lee and Black-eyed Peas, we had a good time and at one point, a couple guys climbed on our nearby dancing platform and "made it rain".  I snagged as many bills out of the air as i could and the next morning I had a fistful of stripper cash.

Thursday - I don't really remember what we did during the day.  I know it involved a lot of walking.  Andy and Kristina went to the Forum Shops at Caesar's Palace and met Pete Rose.  Andy picked up an autographed jersey and bat from the all-time hit king.  Ultimately, we made it back to the pool.  Pete bought some waterproof cards for the wading pool and I contributed a football of booze cocktail.  Not a bad way to spend an afternoon.  In the evening time, we put on our fancy clothes and 8 of us went out to dinner at Pearl at MGM.  We did a quick cocktail hour at Brand before dinner and documented that we do, in fact, clean up nice.  Andy and Kristina met up with us at Pearl and we partook in a grand feast and we all basked in how grown up we were.  Dessert was ridiculous.  Following dinner, we all split up and Pete, Christa, Steph and I went to see Ka, the Cirque du Soleil at MGM.  The show was pretty awesome and the stage was unreal.  After the show, we got our gamble on and met up with Andy who had just endured a "fiasco".  He also confirmed rumors that Konrad and Jenni were in town as he joined them for a little bit at Mandalay Bay.  Not quite ready to call it a night, we headed over to the Times Square Bar for some dueling pianos.  We were not impressed.  Also, the Utah (Alumni?)marching band had taken the place over and I got stuck in a song circle to Come Sail Away by Styx.  Band people are huggy.

Friday - Our last day, we decided to spend our "Romance Package" at the Venetian.  En route, we stopped at the Mirage to see the Secret Gardens of Siegfried and Roy.  They had a baby dolphin and also two white tiger cubs.  They also had Alpacas(who had to be loving the heat) and this sweet turtle.  Starving, we grabbed our free lunch at the Venetian and took our gondola ride which was every bit as awkward as I thought it would be as we share a boat with another couple while our boatwoman sings italian love songs.  Back to the pool for refill on my booze football and then we made the most anticipated trip of the weekend...Fatburger.  It was everything I remembered...This was our last photo opp with Crystal and Ryan as they had to catch a flight home and I can't think of a happier place for it to happen.  We parted ways, and the remaining 6 of us piled into a cab to the Fremont Experience to meet up with Konrad and Jenni at Binions.  We did make contact and did a little gambling at the tables before they had to leave for dinner.  The rest of us went out to the street to mingle with the bikers from BikeFest or something.  Feeling the need to get off our feet we head back to the strip and end up at Hawaiian Tropic Zone and Pete works out a deal to get us in without cover charges and somewhow we get a spot in the VIP area on the patio and watch people stumble down the strip.  We opt for one last stop for 2-for-1's at Brand on our way back to the hotel and call it a weekend.

It ended up being a pretty damn good weekend and I'm glad we could pull together a bunch of people to make a trip like that.  We might just have to do something like that again!

Too much stuff going on, right now.  I feel like I've been running for 3 weeks. 

Steph and I went up to the lake last weekend and it turned out to be a pretty relaxing weekend. I've compiled a great deal of Vegas pictures so a post is coming to recap that weekend, but it'll have to be this weekend because my evenings are full.  I got an opportunity to go bow hunting on Saturday, which I've not had much time to do this fall and I got my first deer in a couple years so the freezer is restocked with meat.  I even had a couple roasts cut out, so I'll have to cook one of those up for a football Sunday. 

I've spent the week researching my next home improvement project that has gotten completely out of hand.  I've got a mess of free carpet so it seems logical to recarpet the upstairs.  Before I do that, it seemed like a good opportunity to take out the wrought iron railing and replace it with wood.  In so doing, I've identified another issue that complicating matters.  The opposite side of the stairs has a half-wall under the railing such that the railing height is not standard so I cannot get ballusters and a newel post to match the other side of the steps without milling them myself.  In addition, all of the trim around the house(and the doors) are finished in a darker stain.  The re-done kitchen is a lighter red-hued oak color.  I think it works in the kitchen.  It modernizes the kitchen and doesn't really contrast the darker moulding and trim because they don't come up against eachother.  In the stairwell, I wanted to match the kitchen's color, sort of tie it all together.  Well, the carpeted stairs are trimmed with this dark wood and there will be an instantaneous impact when you open the door that there is a stark contrast between new and old.  It's inescapable.  My way around it solves another problem.  The carpeted stairs are impossible to keep clean.  Being split-entry house, I run up those stairs all the time because if I need to talk to someone upstairs, I want to make eye contact.  Also, if I forget something on my way out the door, it's often in the kitchen.  So, the stairs get a lot of foot traffic.  The new carpet will cover this up a bit, but I thought a good way to solve my problem would be to rip up the carpeting and put in oak stairs.  That's no small task given I'll have to knock out that half wall for the railing, but I think it'll really class up the entryway at a fairly reasonable price as long as I do the labor.  So now that I wrapped my head around that project, my question is this:

What color do I do the stairs and railing?

Dark brown doors and trim all around the house and I have no intention of removing that or refinishing it.  I really like the lighter color wood(think: this), and I think if the stairs are done this color, in their entirety, the dark brown baseboard won't be distracting or grab your eye(I don't notice it in the kitchen).  Instead of the white stair skirt in the photo, I'd change it to match the stairs.  Pete suggested doing the stairs in light color and the skirt in dark brown to embrace the contrast, so to speak.  He also suggested just doing everything to match the doors and trim in the darker color.  I think that if I do it all in light color, that your eyes will be drawn away from the baseboard where the two colors would jut up against eachother.  I need some opinions.  I apologize for the lack of pictures, but all three of my readers have been in my house anyway.

I watched a bit of the debate last night and read the transcript this morning.  It seemed pretty even to me.  I think both did pretty well, but Obama just seems a hell of a lot calmer and even-keeled through these things.  I think a majority of this election is going to have to boil down to economics given our situation and I like both of their economic plans equally, which is to say I don't really like either of them at all.  They both seem really out of touch with what's going on and neither of them seem to identify where the other is wrong to call them on it.  My take on it is a little beyond what I intended to write today after I rambled on about stairs, but I really would like a smart person to sit down and challenge the candidates to answer in ways that make sense.  I want Obama to explain how all of his tax cuts, rebates, credits and increased funding of programs will be paid for.  Ending the war?  If that's it, great, but it's got to come from somewhere and I haven't heard it yet.  All of this spending on top of a bailout is not helping anyone.  What's a $500 tax credit good for if the price of bread skyrockets to $5 under global inflation?  McCain says we got to bailout the homeowners who can't pay their mortgages.  What?  That makes no sense at all.  They're a big part of why we're in this mess.  It's the most important issue right now, and neither of them make any sense.

Here's an interesting article that explains Obama's "tax cuts".  I've wondered about this for a while and I want to know why McCain hasn't challenged him on this.  Is this too complicated to explain to people in the scope of the political process or does he not get it himself?

First off, a very happy birthday to aflamingstar !!  May it be filled with rainbows and unicorns, and such.

The sky looks really crazy right now.  The clouds are all swirly.  I wish i had my camera because it totally reminded me of Ghostbusters.  I've already spent way too much time trying to track down the screenshot from the scene I'm thinking of, but it's not un-like this shot minus the sunsetting part, obviously.  This one pretty much captures it.  I had no idea how many pictures are taken that remind people of Ghostbusters.  That's pretty awesome.

Last night was my first night bowling since I got back from Las Vegas(Vegas pictures/recap to come next week).  I have to say that the American Meat Institute emerged victorious in fairly epic fashion.  Slim Jim and The Gristle stepped up to eek out 5 points and make a push for first place.  The team did not a thing more than was absolutely needed for victory.  An example of this being the 10th frame of the first game where The Gristle needed 19 pins to seal the victory and threw a: strike - gutter - nine. 

Lastly, I found two really cool videos that explain this whole financial meltdown that has wiped out 2 trillion dollars from the market in the last year and, finally, this week qualifies as a 'crash'.  From October 2nd to October 9th the market has fallen 22%.  To put that in perspective, the crash in 1929 was 23% over 2 days and Black Monday in 1987 was 22.6% in one day.  Neither of these crashes include the total bear market downturn.  The market is down 39% from one year ago.  That's a lot of retirements set back.  So, the first video is in regard to collaterized debt obligations, CDOs, which are what all of these "mortgage backed securities" are that are becoming such a popular topic as of late. 




The second video is about credit default swaps which has exasperated the whole thing.  CDSs are basically insurance policies that are not governed by insurance regulation so anyone can offer them, and everyone did, from banks to insurance companies.  Insurance companies are regulated such that they have to have a certain level of assets to back up their policies so if a tornado hits, they aren't going to leave the homeowner with nothing but a smashed house if the company can't afford the disaster.  Well, CDSs are insurance policies that are called 'swaps' instead(swapping the risk).  Not classified as insurance so there's no pesky asset requirement and no one really knows how big the market for these are, but some estimate it to be $50-60 trillion.  Take a moment to wrap your head around that number and consider that the entire market cap for publicly traded companies in the world topped out around $57 trillion.  So, call me cynical, but explain to me how this $0.7 trillion bailout is planning to accomplish anything. 

At the root of this problem are people who don't belong owning a home that own a home and until they get out, housing won't turn around and this problem cannot be fixed until housing turns around.  I don't see how any "bailout" is worth anything unless the entire focus is to get worthy homeowners to start buying homes.  I'm not sure if that means relaxing FASB Rule 157, which requires firms to value their assets at current values, to allow banks to start selling some conforming loans or if that's only inviting trouble, but that should be our focus.  A google search of FASB Rule 157 yielded this post from last November.  An excerpt below:

Last night was a perfect recipe for kickass.

I've been making sandwiches for work this week to cut down on my $7 lunchtime cravings, which adds up to an embarrassing monthly total.  So, this weekend I stocked the fridge with pastrami, turkey, lettuce, cheese, and bacon.  Also, this gave me an excuse to bust out the mustard my girlfriend got me that claims to be SUPER HOT.  That's such a stereotypical guy thing, there.  Girl goes on vacation and doesn't bring back a trinket or send a postcard, but delivers mustard.  I couldn't be happier.  Anyhoo, last night I was going to cook up all that bacon and toss it in a ziplock bag for easy sandwich assembly.  2 lbs of sweet apple smoked bacon.  It looked delicious.  I didn't have the heart to put it away.  I ate it.  It was good.

So, fueled on bacon, I got a bit of my bowling swagger back.  Not a lot, but I wasn't completely incompetent and while i couldn't get my strike ball with any consistency, I was around the pocket all night so I feel confident that we're moving in the right direction.  The American Meat Institute took all 7 points last night making us a virtual lock for the top 4 which is a pretty good position to be in when, as a whole, we've bowled prett terribly.  I demand that my team eat bacon to guarantee success going forward...also, so they know what I'm dealing with right now.

Last night's Twins game might be in the top 3 regular season games I've watched.  Putting aside the no-hitters or 18 strikeout type games, this has got to be near the top.  I answered the phone so I missed the 4th inning.  As a result, the game I watched we won 7-1.  It was really fun watching it at the bowling alley as everyone was cheering them on.  How the hell did our bullpen do that?  It's all for nought if we can't take care of the Royals, but in my book we just had a playoff series.  I think the most entertaining part of it was watching the young guys get excited.  Span and Casilla have never been in a pennant race and Gomez probably has bad memories of last year's Mets team.  Speaking of the Mets, they're pulling out all the stops...

It's been a relatively slow work week so I find myself falling further and further into the abyss that is the internet.  I'm not sure exactly when it happened, but I got all opinionated about stuff.  I pretty much learned, this week, that if you ignore politics for 29 yrs, there is a lot of catching up to do.  I understand there's a lot going on right now and I'm aware of some of our bigger issues, but I wouldn't say I'm really knowledgeable about any of them.  Thus, as I read one article there is likely some reference to an event or policy that I know nothing about and thank god for the internet having a link ready for me so I can do some background research.  That shit does not happen in print.

I'm not sure when I started caring enough about this stuff to write it down in lieu of linking videos of skateboarders getting hit in the nuts, but I apologize to my readers, both of you, if I'm boring you. 

I mentioned earlier how absolutely fascinating this whole economic crisis is - absolutely horrifying, but fascinating.  Being an economics major, an accountant and an active investor makes this event a pretty big deal to me.  The scale of the disaster is absolutely mind-boggling.  I've linked a whole bunch of stuff lately that is really indepth, but largely difficult to follow without some background so this does a pretty good job of explaining what's going on in relative simplicity while sticking a timeline on it.  Out of all that I've read, that article seems to break it down the best without pinning this on one group. 

It looks like the $700B bailout package is going to happen.  I'm not sure how I feel about that.  Everything about it seems like an utter disaster, but I want to believe that with all these people looking at it and deeming it necessary that they truly believe that it's the only option.  I think there are many ways we could get around the bailout, but it might be too late for that.  On paper this seems pretty much ass backwards:

1.)  Banks are failing because no one wants to buy mortgage backed securities because the people that were issued the mortgages aren't responsible enough to pay them. 

2.)  The taxpayers buy all of the bad mortgages because no one else will.  This saves the banks by allowing them to take on new mortgages.  Hoses the taxpayer.

3.)  Everyone wins.

Wait, what?  I grasp that the government can wait for the market to turn around and the banks can't.  Maybe it really is too late, but it just seems like there is a better way.  All I know, is that John Q. Public is screwed for quite some time.

In other news that is far more pressing in the short-term, the American Meat Institute will continue its quest for glory tonight without its leadoff bowler, Chop.  In his place, the team has turned to the Italian Sausage to bolster its lineup.  This is an exciting time for all of us.  I could not be happier to be bowling this week.  There has been far too many serious things clogging my mind and there's few things more apt to clear that up than 4 dudes, named after meat, imbibing alcohol and getting rowdy over competitive bowling.

Carry on my wayward sons...

Oh, what a glorious day!!!  2008 MLB season is officially a success.  The Twins probably aren't going to make it either, but they weren't supposed to be this close.  Hell, this series is just like the playoffs, anyway.  If we lose, the season's over.

In other anti-Yankees propaganda, I give you an analysis of Derek Jeter's fielding ability.  The same Derek Jeter who is paid $21,000,000 PER YEAR and who I contend has been the most over-rated and overpaid player in baseball for years.  The guys a good hitter, not a great hitter and his winning of the Gold Glove merely shows how much of a popularity contest that is.  He's not the only example of undeserving winners much like he's not the only example of undeserving all-stars or Pro Bowl elections, but very few have more fluff surrounding them than this guy.

I'm so sick of hearing about how Jeter has intangibles.  When someone asks about a player and the first response is, "Oh, he has great intangibles.", it's the same as if you're being set up on a blind date with a girl and when you ask what she's like, the answer is, "Oh, she's got a great personality."  Someone's hiding something.

Does anybody else feel like a month's worth of news just got crammed into the last week?

Last weekend, I intended to go to the lake and kickoff the hunting season, but I'm in the middle of an auto repair that is not going away.  I've been replacing the lower ball joints on my truck which is something I've never done before, but I had a decent set of instructions so I deemed this a manageable project.  This decision was aided by the $1200 estimate I received for the repair and the cost of the replacement parts which were $80.  I've done a hell of a lot more in my life for $1120.  So, the first side, which was really bad took about 2 hours.  A couple things went wrong, but ultimately I learned to watch for those things on the second side.  The second side has been wrought with disaster.  Everything has been so rusted and seized together that I've spent hours pounding on parts to break them free.  My neighbor is a mechanic and he's helped out and utilized a trick he showed me to help remove the rotors using heat to expand the metal.  This technique works beautifully on rotors, but using the same idea on the hub assembly effectively seized bearing by bringing the grease to a boil rendering it glue.  Now the wheel won't turn.  I've got a new hub assembly(not cheap), but I'll be damned if I can get the old one off.  My truck has been on blocks for 10 days.  This sucks.

Hey, the US economy just took a bath.  I hope everyone realizes just how bad this is.  Remember how well deregulation worked in the whole Enron debacle?  Yeah...  I'm all for minimal government, but there are a few things which our entire well-being is based on and those things need to free of fraud.  Just sayin'.  I've read a ton of stuff on this including Time Magazine which is inexplicably being mailed to me right now.  Someone linked me this, but I can't remember who.  It's kind of fascinating how much of this was fueled by greed, because these people knew it wouldn't last.  cashbox linked me this.  You know what's funny?  Everytime McCain says, "The fundamentals of the American economy are strong."  That would be so true if 'strong' meant 'built on popsicle sticks and gypsy tears."

I was just talking to my neighbor on Sunday and he was saying how another house he was working on in North Minneapolis was raided for copper.  Then I saw this.  The very beginning of the video is crazy as the locals tear through the rubble looking for scrap metal to sell.  Hooray U.S. Economy!! 

The Vikings won this weekend.  How handcuffed was the coaching staff with T-Jack?  This was a completely different offense.  Still pretty inept, but it was spread out and Frerotte went to both receivers and tightends, not to mention a few checkdowns to running backs.  It's still pretty terrible, but they've given the team a chance to win with that offense.  I've lost a lot of faith in this coaching staff.  Does Darrell Bevel actually make the play calls?  Is this Childress' fault?  I realize this is a rookie head coach and they probably deserve the same amount of time to develop as a rookie QB.  Well, we've yanked the QB.  Just sayin'.

I leave for Vegas in a week.  I could not be happier about that.  I need some rest and some sun.  Well, at least I'll get some sun.  You know what's kind of sad?  Of all the fun stuff awaiting in Vegas, I'm most looking forward to the hotdog and Heineken for $2.50.  This summer went by so fast, that I feel like I totally missed out on the simplicity of grilling and cold beer, which is pretty much the only thing I really like about summer.  3 ft of Margarita by the pool won't be so bad either.

I'm taking the awesomest class ever right now: Monsters, Robots and Cyborgs.  'Nuf said.

The Twins are on the brink of elimination, but the Yankees are too!!

That's really all I got today.

Seeing reporters get hurt in ridiculous ways:

Where to begin...?

Going into this Sunday's game, my expectations were curbed.  I don't really recall a time in the Peyton Manning era where the Vikings would have been given a shot to win this game.  After last weekend's Indy loss to Chicago, the buzz seemed to be working against the Colts and many seemed to think this was a winnable game for the Vikings.  I failed to see that we were a markedly better team than last year after the loss to the Packers in week 1.  However, I was willing to concede that we could make this a competitive game. 

So, as I settled into my blue plastic seat in the Metrodome, I was treated to one of the more impressive defensive performances I've seen in a while.  Make no mistake, this Vikings defense is legit.  Peyton Manning's passing numbers may not tell that story, but even Peyton Manning struggled to do ANYTHING against this D and many passing yards can be attributed to a run game that was more or less abandoned. 

Adrian Peterson was his usual Purple Jesus self.  On one play, the Metrodome announcer said Peterson was tripped up at the line of scrimmage.  He was.  He still made it 2nd and 2.  He faced 8 in the box all freakin' day and still moved the chains.  The Vikings outrushed their opponents by a staggering 180-25.  It didn't feel that close.

The Vikings offense started, on average, at their 34 yard line and the Colts started on their 24.  In fact, the Colts only sniffed Vikings territory for a few seconds prior to the breakdown in coverage 11 minutes into the 3rd quarter.  They were in Vikings territory for no more than 4 minutes of gameclock and that total likely would have been closer to 1 minute had Reggie Wayne not been tackled at the goal line following the aforementioned blown coverage leading to a few failed QB sneaks that chewed some clock.

Both teams were fairly penalty free, but the Vikes had only 2 penalties for 5 yards.

They won the turnover battle.

They won the time of posession battle.

They shut out the high-powered Colts offense in the first half for the first time in 2 years.

Yet, everyone in the stadium could feel it.  It felt like a Gopher game.  You know the feeling.  Michigan 38 - Minnesota 35.  Northwestern 41 - Minnesota 35.  Texas Tech 44 - Minnesota 41.  I could go on, but I haven't healed yet. 

There is no excuse for blowing a game when you have every statistical advantage you could possibly dream of.  That has to come down to coaching, right?  Jackson was abysmal.  He looked lost.  He missed wide open guys.  He looked uncomfortable.  He missed one guy by 15 yds which was either a miscommunication or the ball slipped or, God help us, he just missed him.  It was clear, that he was not going to put his team on his shoulders and carry them to victory.  Why, then, did the coaches force him into a situation where that was required?  Repeatedly, the passing game was completely ignored despite the fact that 8 men were stacked in the box all day.  Most plays the free safety played centerfield, a solid 15 yds off the line of scrimmage.  They begged us to pass.  It was clear that the coaches didn't have faith in Jackson to handle even the most basic of functions.  They ran the play action bootleg about 5 times and while I like the idea of getting Jackson out in space, there was no intermediate passing game.  The play was ineffective, at best.  This offense is so unbelievably predictable that it's mind boggling.  I'm sitting there in the second half seeing all of this play out and wondering why if we absolutely refuse to throw, the Colts know we refuse to throw, and they are stacking the box, why don't we spread it out a little.  Who cares if our #4 or #5 receivers can't catch, our #1 and #2 receivers had ZERO catches.  Trot out 4 wide and hand it off to Peterson.  If nothing else, it gives him some room to run or make a guy miss.  Most of the 4th quarter we went with 2 and 3 TE sets and squeezed everybody into a tight spot and sent Peterson up the middle. 

We can say all we want about Jackson and his inneffective play, but the truth is the coaches have done nothing to take advantage of his strengths and I still think he offers us the best chance to win every Sunday.  This is the blandest offense I have ever seen in my life.  They run.  The roll out and complete 5 yard screen passes.  They chuck it inneffectively 50 yds downfield.  There are no crossing routes and throwing downfield only works if you complete the passes.  They seem to bolster Jackson's confidence with short 5 yard routes and then once per half let him throw it as far as he can.  That doesn't lead to success.  I don't think we could put a Donovan McNabb in this offense and make it click.  It's uncreative and it's hurting Jackson and not the other way around.  It is dumbed down so much that it really doesn't even matter what Jackson does.

I thought that it seemed dumb to rest a talented team with a win now approach on an inexperienced quarterback.  The reality is we've placed the whole operation on an inexperienced coach and this is going nowhere.

Last night, Park Tavern witnessed the debut of the team that embodies the future of bowling.  Before a gathered crowd estimated in the hundreds, The American Meat Institute introduced its four team members who bring a wealth of experience and God-given talent to the team. 

Leading off, "Chop" devastates the pins with a crushing attack and a flambouyant hop leaving his opponents to wonder, "Lamb or pork?"  In the two-hole, the newest member of the team, Mutton, uses a two prong attack that overwhelms the pins with an erratic precision previously unseen.  Hey, salad's got nothin' on this mutton.  Maintaining his quiet leadership, T-Bone bowls third.  With a long history of making people feel uncomfortable, T-Bone delivers a psychological blow to his opponents while his wicked hook wreaks havoc at the end of the lane.  When asked how T-Bone earned his moniker, Mutton explained rather matter-of-factly, "He's the only one who has boned a T."  Moving on.  Holding down the anchor position for this team is Gristle.  Gristle can be his opponents worst nightmare providing the knockout in the metaphorical "96er" of head-to-head bowling.

Last night, the team trained hard to get themselves back into bowling shape, a demanding physical regimen that will prepare them for the long and arduous season ahead.  The team studied oil patterns and developed strategies.  Mutton familiarized himself with the poker rules so he could step in and be competitive right out of the gate.  Pizza was consumed with their non-bowling arms to prevent an embarrassing gutter ball.  Beer was consumed at a brisk pace to maintain the bell-shaped success curve:

There are so many happenings in the world that you all should be aware of!

First and foremost, I have Vikings tickets for this Sunday's game against the Colts.  I'm very much looking forward to seeing the debut of the 2008 Minnesota Vikings after last week's game was cancelled due to the Republican National Convention(Yeah, that's what happened).

Tonight, is the return of competitive bowling.  While I suspect that we will be competitive, I have a feeling our scores will not be.  That said, a weak showing when the handicaps are set only leads to glory for this band of misfits dubbed The American Meat Institute.

This weekend, i'm diving headfirst into automotive repair because I honestly have no idea what is keeping my front passenger wheel on at this point.  Seriously, the hum from the vibration is deafening and when I hit bumps I'm in the air long enough to question whether I'm going to make it.  In other words, my truck doesn't exactly hug the road.

I guess fall is here now.  It just got cold one day and it doesn't appear to be going back.  It always seems sudden.  At any rate, it's awesome.  Summer sucks.  Bring on football, Oktoberfest, hay rides, apple/pumpkin selection, squash smothered in butter(maybe even brown sugar), sleeping weather, sweatshirts, hunting season i.e. napping in a tree, pumpkin beer, and haunted houses.  This is the best season of the year and it's not even close.  Days like yesterday make me seriously consider moving north. 

It's 9/11 so the media is all over it reminding us not to forget.  How long are we supposed to celebrate/remember a given event?  We don't really acknowledge D-Day or presidential assasinations unless its a nice round number anniversary.  Isn't this an anniversary for the people who really experienced it?  I sat and watched the whole thing unfold on tv, but I wasn't in NY when it happened and I don't know a single person who was directly affected by it.  This doesn't discount its significance, because there is no doubt life, as we know it, changed that day.  I would probably argue that life should have changed before that and remembering the day that we finally opened our eyes seems convenient more than anything.  I'm not even sure what I'm really arguing here...it just seems like this even more than any in my lifetime seems to hold the most significance to people and while I identify the tragic nature of it, I feel like this shouldn't be the case.  At any rate, a picture from outer-space!!

Here's a pretty funny video of a Rolling Rock commercial deemed innappropriate for television.  I think all would be fine if they just edited out the last 3 seconds or so, but I like it in its entirety.

As a follow up to my Palin rant from a week ago, a snippet posted by aflamingstar showing that women have swung in droves to the McCain ticket after the announcement.  While the Palin move could largely be considered insulting to women, it appears that the 7 out of 10 rule continues to apply.   Jason Bourne wants to know why we're so stupid:

I don't really consider myself a political person.  I didn't even vote in my first opportunity to do so and I kind of feel like most of the time we're dealing with a "Giant Douche vs. Turd Sandwich" situation.  Usually, I don't even really tune in to the speeches or lead-up to the elections until October, which is unfortunate because, as it's explained to me, the primarys are really where my voice is heard most. 

For Christmas, I asked for a book about the presidents - a breakdown of accomplishments and failings from a neutral party because finding information that isn't spun one way or another is difficult these days.  Why did I want the book?  Mostly to argue with other people with legitimate facts instead of a whole bunch of spun propaganda which is what everyone else uses.  It sorted of started with a discussion with my dad regarding Hillary that ultimately led to him proclaiming that Bill Clinton was the worst president we'd ever had.  I've only been alive for a few presidents and I was only 14 when Bill took office so I don't claim to be an expert, but that seemed a little much.  A major focus of my dad's argument was Clinton's infidelity which he equated to a bad president.  In what turned out to be the easiest logical attack ever, I quickly got him to say that Kennedy was a good president and then pointed out Kennedy's alleged indiscretions.  Infidelity, while not suggested, does not make you a good or bad president.  Politics, to me, is a necessary evil which provides us reason to bicker.  I accept that.

It's not that I lack opinions.  If I have any knowledge on the subject, I have an opinion.  I just believe that the system only allows so much success.  Bi-partisan politics seems to take any room for serious progress out of the equation.  While, I appreciate that some days, it's kind of defeating on others.

I don't consider myself Democratic or Republican, but socially left and fiscally right.  More or less, I'm looking for a competent person to be the representative of the United States.  They don't have to represent me and couldn't possibly represent everyone.  Who's going to represent me and at the same time represent the catfish noodler?  It just has to be someone who is intelligent and charismatic.  Honestly, his or her politics matters, but more so in getting them in office than once they are there.  For example, a candidate who supports the "One Child Policy" probably would never make it into office.  Is there anyone out there who believes that if he made it to office, he'd ever get that policy enacted?  Obviously, this is an extreme example, but there are plenty of issues that aren't worth making a huff about. 

When McCain(who I think would make a good president by my standards) picked Palin, my first instinct was to think how obvious it was to pick a woman.  It was an unintentionally sexist thought fueled by speculation that perhaps Meg Whitman would be the choice.  My issues with Palin(and I state these not knowing too much about Biden) are not all of the little issues about her daughter or her pro-life stance or whether she is or isn't a "hockey mom".  What happens if she becomes president?  You have to at least consider the possibility.  I'm fine with a woman as our president, however there are few choices with less qualifications than Palin.  McCain touted her as the governor of the largest state in the U.S.  Well, yeah, but the 47th largest by population.  Zero foreign policy history, in fact, she's only left the country once in her life(excluding neigboring Canada).  I watched her speech last night and it was brutal.  Trying to snare the female vote(which he'll do) by adding Palin to the bill, McCain is literally mocking women with this selection.  I know that the so-called "7 out of 10" probably will fall victim to this ploy, but this is ridiculous.  I see what people saw in Hillary.  She had loads of experience as both a first lady and a senator.  I can see her representing our country.  I don't think there are many people McCain could have picked that are worse-suited for being our president.

There are literally a ton of articles trashing Palin and who knows what is actually real and what is political bullshit, but this one seemed as legit as any that I read today.

As someone on the fence, I think McCain made a mistake.  If, however, the Republicans win in November spouting the same politics as Bush has the last 8 years he's been in office, with an economy in the tank, a war that is dragging on so long that no one even knows what's happening, and a plummeting image in world politics, then the terrorists have won.  Because, wow.

It's official.

Worst. TV. Edit. Ever.

 I heard this on the 93x morning show this morning and thought it was pretty funny.  Sports announcing is always filled with double entendres and sexual connotations, so I think the Olympics would be the perfect place to showcase this.